After my last post, I have been having a think. I have decided to reevaluate some 'friendships', and to make an executive decision about their true value. It strikes me that if it takes 10 units of effort to continue a friendship with a person, and they only ever give you back 4 units, then it's probably not that worthwhile expending all that energy. It sounds harsh, but I have come to realise that many people over the years have viewed me through a certain lens, and that lens is unflattering. Such friendships will always be uneven. My personality is such that I have to find people like me, who are tolerant and go out of their way for others (not tooting my own horn, this is just how I am and how life has shaped me). People I bond with are compassionate and empathic. Those people are less likely to abuse me and my good nature. They are less likely to view my challenges in life as purely weaknesses to be exploited.
Anyway, my struggle with Low Dose Naltrexone continues. I am at 2.5mg. I was talking to a friend who is also taking it. She does not have M.E., but does have other chronic health problems including Hashimoto's. We were talking about whether I feel I should continue. At the moment, I cannot distinguish what is M.E., and what is AI thyroid disease. It's awkward. Earlier on in this trial of taking LDN, I had the feeling that it was helping me. I felt more stamina and had bouts of being cognitively/mentally better. Around Christmas, I was managing so well and felt dramatically improved compared to now. Lately, I have felt quite horrible, which of course results in me being able to do less. This then leads to me feeling frustrated with my body and my life, which is never good.
I have come to the conclusion that not taking Low Dose Naltrexone will probably reveal that it was doing something and then I will regret giving it up. Plus, I have read that people with M.E. that stop it, go back to square one when they restart it - all those nasty symptoms I had as a side effect, which I do not fancy revisiting.
With that in mind, I have decided to wait until the beginning of February before increasing my dose again. It is possible I went too fast when increasing, and as my friend pointed out, when you have been sick for years, it may take far longer to get the same level of wellness as someone who got sick more recently. A good point indeed. Patience!
I shall, of course, keep updating with how I am doing. You never know, I might miraculously have a dramatic upturn. I can hope!
Lastly...
No Poster Girl - http://nopostergirl.com - pointed out my lack of RSS feed. I have looked into it just now with a mush-brain, and apparently I do have one, but the signup link is really silly and hidden at the bottom of the entire page (duh blogger!). I need to fix this, and will get on to that in the next few days - from what I have read, it will take a bit of brain power. In the meantime, I do believe you can find my feed at this URL -> http://seekanswerswithme.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default?alt=rss
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